Missing My Sailor

I just miss him so much.

Weight Loss Goals

Tonight I had an appointment with Trey, my trainer at Lifestyle Family Fitness. I took the advice of my good friend Christina Benz, who did some investigating for me, and signed up for a weekly training session. After all, I do want to look amazing not only standing on the pier waving as my sailor pulls in, but also the day my daddy walks me down the aisle to marry that handsome sailor. I also purchased the piece of exercise equipment in the picture above. Tommy and Chanda, my brother and sister-in-law, sent me a Bed Bath and Beyond gift card, and I used it to go towards the purchase of the Ab Circle. It is actually pretty fun. It is challenging, but when I am at home dreaming of my weight-loss goals it is easy to just hop on here. I even challenged myself to do 15 minutes on it while my quinoa (also introduced to me by Mrs. Benz.. she is full of good ideas) was cooking.

Anywho... my newest goal is to lose 30 more pounds by my 30th birthday, which is on May 2nd. I will keep everyone updated on how things are going and I will post my weight-loss every Tuesday. This is gonna be challenging, but having accountability will push me... especially if I am gonna post it here. YIKES!

Just my thoughts...

Today my mind's eye appears fixed on expectations. I acknowledge my own ability to expedite life, pressing contingencies to their breaking point. I am aware that some positions need extra petitioning, but minor details which effect major events deserve swift thought and execution. Besides, those who tarry may find themselves with only scraps. Sometimes I feel like Cinderella, waiting, completely mindful that at any moment my dress will be but rags and horse-drawn carriage turned to pumpkin and mice. I offered liberties to decide out of submission and respect, only to realize that these timely details are tossed aside. Have I mishandled my own liveliness? Have I extended control to one who lacks concern? A careless, half-hearted approach will only further offend my already anxious disposition. I assumed that one who cared so much would have reciprocal feelings of angst, eager to move along due to longings intensified by separations. I guess assumption never really serves anyone well.

Wedding Plans

Well... It stinks that I haven't blogged more this month. I have been major busy at work and sometimes just a little lazier than I should be. I will try to be better.

So... Today I went to a bridal show. It was lots of fun. The best part was when I got a phone call from Brian. I sure do miss him and it thrills me to hear his voice. I choke back tears most times as it breaks my heart to think he is so far away.

At the bridal show there were tons of vendors... photographers, cake artists, D.J.'s, florists, etc, all were giving samples of their product, business cards, information about costs. They also had models prancing around to display the latest fashions.

When I got the call from Brian I had wedding stuff on the brain. Perhaps I shouldn't have, but I couldn't help but try to push him along on some of our plans.... mostly A DATE!!! He is procrastinating, not unlike him. I love him, and how he loves to procrastinate. We found a venue, but they are already booking dates for 2011. If he doesn't hurry, we may have to find another place. Ugh. Hope he decides really soon.

Honeymoon List

So I didn't make it to the gym tonight. :(
Last night I didn't get to talk to Brian online b/c I was so tired from the gym that I got in bed before he got online. The night before I basically did the same except I was logging off just as he got on and was so tired I couldn't chat long.
Tonight I was determined to make sure I wasn't too tired to chat... but I didn't make to the gym... so.
While Brian and I were chatting we decided that we are going to start compiling a list of possible honeymoon destinations. I am SO excited! I haven't been all that many places and the thought of going somewhere awesome... just he and I... sounds so dreamy!

My first destination that I added to my list.... FIGI!

Bike Ride

In honor of last night's Biggest Loser episode I decided to recreate my own "Biggest Loser Challenge". In the show's challenge, two teammates were striving to bike (stationary) a combined total of 26.2 miles... the distance of a marathon. The team that made the finish line first got immunity.

Tonight although I had no one to race against. I pushed myself to at least make the 13.1 miles that would have been expected of one of the teammates. I spent 70 minutes, 60 of full out riding and 10 minutes of cool down, riding to reach the mark. I rode a total distance of 14.14 miles in that time. I was a little disappointed over the amount of calories burned, but this exercise was for fun... in honor of a very inspiring show.

When I got home I made myself a snack. I sat down, took one bite... and then it hit me... I just worked my tail off and I am not about to ruin it with this snack. I want this snack SO MUCH LESS than I want to be fit. I immediately proceeded to the trash and grabbed some Crystal Light instead. Each time I am tempted I try to remember how important this is to me, not only to do this for my own health... but to prepare myself to be a beautiful bride.

The Biggest Loser

Tonight is the first night of The Biggest Loser.
I feel so heartbroken over the guy who is 526 pounds.
I know all too well how it feels for the weight to creep on and suddenly one day you realize that you are much heavier than you thought you'd ever be.
I'm gonna keep watching for inspiration.

About my day... I worked at the facility in Daytona Beach today. There are things to fix and I have to go back tomorrow.

I have felt a little down today. I mean, I am not totally depressed or anything. There is just a nagging in the back of my mind that Brian is away for SEVEN MONTHS! I am so incredibly proud of him. He sent me a quick email today saying that he loves me. That always helps.

More tomorrow...

Internet gods!

I know that I was only planning on one post a day, but I just wanted to put out this quick note. I would like to say a special thank you to the internet gods. We have maintained contact with the ship via internet since they left. There is a bit of a delay, but contact is contact. I don't think that any of us expected it to be up for this long... and God forgive me if I jinx it... but kudos to all the sailors who have kept the lines of communication open for family's sake.

Get Funky with It!

Moya Family before deployment (Jan 2, 2010)

My new friend Cristina Moya and her five year old son Cristian joined me for church this morning. It was nice to have someone to sit with. I have been attending Chet’s Creek Church for a few years now… with one lengthy break when I was doing a study on another church and wanted to see if it was a fit. As I tried to think back about what I felt and initially thought about Chet’s and what has kept me there long term...these things came to mind.

At the end of the day what I love about my church is this (these are in random order)…

My pastor is a real guy, with a real accent (southern just like mine) and an undying love for the LSU Tigers, who DOESN’T have a comb-over (no offense, my daddy has a comb-over and he rocks it) or stands in front of you in some outrageously expensive suit while some members in his congregation just want to pay their freakin’mortgage. He looks like your uncle… not the weird uncle in mid-life crisis mode with the Harley gear and an earring… but the uncle who you’d call if you needed help. He talks to you, encourages you, lifts you up. He doesn’t preach at you or make you feel bad because sometimes life just sucks and things end up a little differently than you originally planned.

It is focused on meeting me where I am. Let’s just face it, I don’t have it all together (nobody even gasped in surprise). I am overly-emotional and unorganized at times. I have worn laundry that I took out of the dirty clothes basket more than once. I am a control freak at times and have high expectations on how I think people should respond to certain situations... usually too high for even the most perfect of individuals to meet up to.

I HEART the music. In my former life, I lead worship in a church for almost seven years and good music never hurts. They have a great band and sometimes I have to remind myself that I am not at a concert... "This isn’t a concert… sing! Worship how you feel lead." Some keep quiet and prefer to meditate, but I am the annoying girl who tries to sing over the rest of the congregation.

At times it gets really funky. My pastor has driven a motorcycle across the stage to start his sermon. The ministerial staff did there own version of “Stomp” banging brooms and trash cans to an original beat that they composed. They once set off a rocket in the church to teach the kids about being charitable. They send out a mission team to a foreign country almost once a month. We have days when we wear our college or NFL team colors or jerseys and talk smack about everybody’s teams. It is lots of fun!

I think Cristina summed it up great when she said… “It is nice to visit a church with REAL people”.

Cristina, Thank you so much for coming with me this morning!!! It is great when you have someone to share and spend time with... even when our sailors are away.

Setting Sail

Well this morning was it ... day one of 213 days of distance between me and my future husband Brian, aka "Sailor", aka "Mr. Wonderful".

As I stood at the pier's edge and watched the lines being pulled in, I couldn't help but feel overwhelmed with pride. I was beholding the "world's greatest Navy" prepare for battle. The ship seemed so majestic like a toy with new batteries, only much, much bigger. The sailors were all running about, performing last minute duties with such fluency, as if they had perfected their motions long ago and it is was merely second nature. This was the moment they had been preparing for and dreading for months now.

You know, you really don't understand the sacrifice of a military family until you see a deployed father stare into the eyes of his wife and gaze upon his children with a broken heart. It is like witnessing a warrior melt, even Brian fought to hold back tears more than once. I held up pretty good until I realized the tug was actually pulling the boat away... then I cried. I felt my heart leaving me and heading deep into the Atlantic. I know that Brian and I have it much easier than those with children, but seeing him getting smaller and smaller as the boat pulled farther and farther away simply brought the distance and length of time at the forefront of my perspective.

While he is gone we are both committed to a positive journey, growing individually and together even though we are thousands of miles apart. This blog is for our journey.... Bon Voyage to us both.